poetry

Observe

A desperate need to go far away

Did you hear the storms and see the opaque thunders?
The time when a body is a box of twitches and imperfections
like pervasive corrosion of diamonds,
too deep and too broad to demarcate a periphery.
A thunderbolt is riveting inside my earlobe.
A thin film of vintage cassettes play the sorrows,
trembling in the momentum of hurricane body.
Ransacking inner soul to find a twitch, a glitch.
A pack of stars drowned in the blue hemisphere
Music: an extension of crooked smiles,
Swaying of broken memories and false hopes
Is that you hear too?


©My Valiant Soul

49 thoughts on “Observe

  1. Sigh….scars so deep and broad that the body is a box of corroding diamonds without periphery… opaque thunder (deeply visual and great use of oxymoron as we never think about seeing thunder)…thunderbolt riveting in the ear…hurricane body…vintage cassettes playing sorrow…swaying and moving…. twitching…Devika, I know no other poet in the world, who writes like you do. Your uniqueness is your instrument and your words, deep, intelligent, vivid and brilliant, sparkle like stars against a dark night sky. This is one of those pieces that speak top and through me. We all want to know if that someone experiences the storms like we do. Your work is truly breathtaking.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh my! Alex
      Trust me, out of all your remarks somehow this is my favourite and i have no specific reason why.
      I am glad you saw the use of Oxymoron and there my friend I am satisfied.
      It touches my heart when a gem like you gives your review which is ofcourse pious to me.
      You know my world, you know my dark secret words and you know me as a poet too.
      Thank you for everything and your constant showering of blessings.
      You are incredible!🙏

      Liked by 2 people

      1. You are most welcome, Devika. It’s funny you say this because I found this poem to be on of my favorites but I can’t say exactly why. I guess some things cannot be expressed in word so we let our feelings course through our thoughts and then we do our best to try and explain what, how and why we feel. Reading you is always a blessed experience – it’s like going to a temple to cleanse the spirit. For that, I am truly grateful!!! Peace, respect and a lifetime of blessings upon you, my dear poetic friend 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  2. “corrosion of diamonds”
    “A pack of stars drowned in the blue hemisphere”
    These are some of exceptional pieces of imagery. Part of what can make an image standout so strongly in a reader’s mind is an unusual or different way to describe things from what we are used seeing. Such images are “fresh” and often provide a new a way of looking at things and will standout and be remembered by a reader.
    Over the years doing different kinds of writing the greatest compliment I could give a writer in my mind was if when I read something they had written I would say to myself…”I wish I had written that…”
    These lines fall in that category.
    As I said, they are exceptional in the visual images they create.
    Have a nice day Star Diamond.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. And once again you have humbled me by your sweet gesture.
      Your writings are pure and magical and i truly love them. I cannot imagine comparing my imageries with your vivid ones.
      Still I am pleased to hear your sweet words as you praise me even more Forrest!
      Your blessings are my guidance I guess.
      Thankyou for this lovely lines and your precious time on my work.
      Peace to you!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. calming, you say everytime I comment 😇..and I comment because I can’t help it..your writing is sublime, makes the reader or at least me get lost in the poetic world of surreal images, emotions, thoughts..

        Liked by 1 person

      2. and you make me smile saying that, my comments may sound kind because you are humble but I am usually very objective about what I write, you must have noticed.

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s